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[daemonized]

ARDYN IZUNIA

Ardyn Izunia. Professor of law. Lord of law. Liege of law. The one grading your papers. Leave a message.

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

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Comments

[daemonized]

[Wh...at.

Good thing Ardyn is awake to see this. If he had a normal sleep schedule, he might've missed out on this strange but amusing opportunity. Thank god for borderline insomnia, some nights.]

Noctis, try that again for me.

[kittycaterer]

tru what agaon
wat

[ Get fucking prepared; this will be the ride of your life, Ardyn. ]

[daemonized]

[He's trying so hard not to laugh already. This is priceless. He can't wait to show everyone.]

Never mind. It's nothing.

Looking forward to class tomorrow?

[TOMORROW.]

[kittycaterer]

[ Wow. This is a special, private moment here. You can't just share it with everyone! ]

stoked
Lokje a kid in a cndhy stire

[daemonized]

I hope you'll be prepared? You know it's an early class. About... oh, a handful of hours from now, at the most?

[kittycaterer]

waqit
wait
hwat tiem is clsas

[kittycaterer]

[ 30 seconds later your phone is ringing ]

[daemonized]

[Okay, well.

Ardyn will answer. This can only get better.]

Yes?

[kittycaterer]

[ There's a lot of crackling and shuffling around. And a belch. Followed by a very meek "whoops".

He's by himself. He should be in bed, but he's not. ]

[daemonized]

Noctis?

[HELLO NOCTIS.....?

He rubs at the back of his neck, and there is no doubt that this young man is very, very drunk.

So you know what, he's going to listen to those scuffling and belching noises until someone realizes that they've butt dialed him.]

[kittycaterer]

Mm?

[ He hears his name, and he notices that his phone screen is still on and bright. Noctis grabs his phone, sounding very much confused and slurred. ]

What?

Who'ssis?

[daemonized]

[He is so, so drunk. Yes, definitely.

It's so hard not to laugh.]

Noctis.

[God.]

You're the one who called me? It's Ardyn. Ardyn Izunia? Your professor.

[kittycaterer]

[ Noctis hums thoughtfully, as if trying to remember whether or not he did, in fact, call Ardyn first.

He decides: ]

Pff. No I dinnt, s'like two in the morning or somethin'.

[ He makes a conscious effort to read the clock. He fails. ]

Is it?

Why'd you call me?

[daemonized]

[He wishes he could be recording this right now. God. Why can't someone else be here to experience this. Why?]

I didn't... you...

[Ardyn is trying hard not to laugh. This is a feat unto itself, thanks Noctis.]

You must've butt-dialed me.

1/3

[kittycaterer]

[ Noctis knits his brow as he listens, wobbling on the couch when he sits up.

There's a good moment of silence that seems to follow immediately until... ]

2/3

[kittycaterer]

[ AUDIBLE SNORT. ]

[kittycaterer]

[ Did he just say "butt"?

Did Ardyn just say the word "butt"????

Yes he fucking did.

He so fucking did, and Noctis doesn't even say anything. He starts laughing like a damn child. ]

[originallutece]

[Oh, dang, guess who just woke up.]

Noctis?

[OH DANG MOM'S UP AND SHE'S MAD]

It's two in the bloody morning, who the hell are you talking to?

[kittycaterer]

[ OH SHIT.

Noctis is drunk enough to look ridiculously spooked when Rosalind appears from her room. He perks up, looking like he's been caught committing a crime.

But that fades pretty quick. Noctis starts snickering again as he points to the phone. ]

It's Ardyn.

He... He called me, I swear.

[originallutece]

Did he.

[A FUCKING LIAR, CAELUM.]

Give me the phone.

[kittycaterer]

[ Wow wtf????!!!!

Noctis snorts again and hands over the phone. Ever-compliant. It's your house, mom. ]

Fair warning, he's talkin' about butts.

[originallutece]

I'm certain he is.

[Hello Ardyn my old friend, I've come to talk with you again.]

Is this Ardyn?

[daemonized]

[There is just so much going on. Between the hysterical laughter of Noctis and more voices in the background, Ardyn is honestly wondering what on earth he's gotten into, what with this butt-dial.

But he's met with Rosalind's voice, and his humor seems to spike further, and there's something edging on laughter in his tone.]

Rosalind! It certainly is none other than I. Your'e up rather late.

[originallutece]

Not willingly, I assure you. Noctis, sit down--

[That's the Professor voice right there.]

I assume he called you?

[daemonized]

He texted first. Some gibberish that was barely decipherable.

And then he called me. Accidentally. I assume he's drunk.